Sunday, March 9, 2008


Life just seems to build to a crescendo sometimes and I then dig in my heels, grit my teeth and keep going. Maybe it's my conservative Christian upbringing that leads me to this modus operandi. Why do I keep going when what I really need to do is to step out of the "running stream" and STOP and take a deep breath. What breathes life back into me is being alone. It's amazing what one hour by myself can do for me. I feel physically lighter. I'm able to smile freely again, to give again to my husband, my daughter and my son. I just NEED to remind myself to take that time out that is so vital for myself and my relationships.


Terri said...

mmmmmm...i hear you annie. this is so true and so undervalued in our culture. the need to be alone and regroup is no less real than the need to eat or sleep or breath. if we're listening (something i'm learning little by little) our bodies will let us know about these needs. for me, when this need rises up, my body starts to curl in on itself and tense like a piano wire. when i listen and tend to these signals wisely i can be in the world in a whole new way. when i don't listen...well, you already read my post, so you know all about that. :) bless you dear.

Anonymous said...

its called important...but not urgent - that's why the mommy rest that is so very needed at times gets pushed back - we all know its important but there is always something more urgent in front of us, calling/screaming and crying to us to be done...hang in there and try to carve in some time for the "non-urgent yet still important"

bella said...

Right there with you.
I NEED that time alone. It is how I restore myself and ground myself and replenish the reserves.
when I don't get it, I feel empty and brittle, snapping at everyone and making us all miserable.
hard to remember this, that it is important, part of loving myself ANd others.
May you take the time you need and may it feed you.

Anonymous said...


First of all, thanks for the comment on John's site. You're too nice. I'm just stumbling along like everyone else doing my best to maintain my sanity!

Which brings me to your blog entry. For me it's not time spent alone that re-energizes me but time spent with friends. An hour at a coffee shop with a good friend having adult conversation does a world of good for me. I've heard before that the difference between an extrovert and an introvert is what gives you energy. If it's time spent with other people, you're an extrovert. If it's time spent alone, you're an introvert. I'm a confirmed extrovert! I've never met a party I didn't like.

Take care, Annie! I'm glad to know you.


Annie's Porch said...

Terri-I do that too. My back and shoulders get tight and I curl. When Ian was in the hospital I was so tight I had trouble walking.

Anon- I think it is vital for some people. If I don't get time alone to be energized I'm not as good a wife or mother. Another example is Andrea Yates. She lost it and killed her kids. Therefore I do think it can be an urgent need and not just a want to recharge your batteries.

Bella- It's so good that you do know what you need and do it. Thanks for the reminder to do what I need.

Ann- It's funny, I'm kind of a mix. I very much enjoy being with others and even get energized by it, but then I need to pull back and have some time alone. I'm very glad to know you too Ann.

Anonymous said...

it is vital...I didn't really mean to imply that it isn't, by saying "its not urgent" I just mean that it is not screaming out to you at times like all the other things you end up "prioritizing" over the down time...for example - I would put my prayer life in this category - is it important, yes very much so to me, but is it in my face urgently yelling for me to stop and do it - at times maybe when I hit the breaking point, but for the most part no - I can push it back once again until I have the "time" to stop and do it. That's what I meant - it is important and we need to "make it urgent" as well I guess.