Tom and I were talking this morning about how our lives have changed now that we have Ian. I was telling him that it feels like we have three kids: Silvi, Ian and Down syndrome (I know, it's kind of an odd analogy, but...) Ds takes so much time, energy and Dr. appointments that it almost equals a whole other child's worth of worries etc.
Tom asked me if there was a magic pill that I could give Ian that would make his Ds disappear. When Ian was first born I said I didn't think so because Ds is part of who Ian is, but now I DEFINITELY would give him that magic pill. NO kid should ever have to be in the hospital for two weeks after being born (with tubes coming out of every orafice), have heart surgery at six weeks of age, be hospitalized for respiratory failure, have multiple ear tube surgeries as well as get ridiculed from others for years to come (and there are for sure more surgeries/complications ahead). So YES, I would give my Ian the magic pill if it would spare him all that pain.
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4 comments:
Oh, Annie. We are both engrossed in a riddle wrapped in an enigma, or something like that. Some of us are afraid that we'd be diminished as parents, that our love couldn't be complete if we admit what you've just said. I, of course, agree with you - and it doesn't mean that we love our children any less. My Emma is remarkably like her Mother - with T21. Oh, that there could be no paradox. Yes.
Elbog-You are so lovely and affirming! I SO appreciate all of your insights. Thank you for your response.
I'd give that pill in a second as well. I love your analogy of Ds being a third child. I sometimes feel that way too. It is like the Ds is a separate entity that we need to deal with, separate from who my son is, which of course makes no sense because it is such a big part of who he is.
Chris-Thanks for stopping by. Interesting that you feel the same way I do about Ds being like another child. It's nice to feel validated! Take care!
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